


Car Radio

by DaughterOfAthena



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dorian also loves when Lavellan sings, M/M, There's some stories from my basic training, it will make sense I promise, just look closely, lavellan is an infantry soldier, letters and phone calls, letters to home and friends, soldier Lavellan, thats a big deal too, these chapters are short
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-10
Updated: 2017-01-02
Packaged: 2018-08-20 12:44:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 7,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8249578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaughterOfAthena/pseuds/DaughterOfAthena
Summary: Hadiden Lavellan enlisted into the army, which upset Dorian more than he realized. As much as Dorian wanted Hadiden to stay, finish his degree in biology, he wasn't going to keep him back. 
Hadiden writes home to his boyfriend and his friends, all while doing his training and even when he deploys. 
What happens when he is deployed will haunt him and Dorian until he's sent home.
(Half of this will be made up, like his deployment, but most of the funny tales Hadiden will tell are from my own experiences, but switched to a male point of view instead of female)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> All characters belong to Bioware, Dragon age, and so on. I don't own any of the characters. Also, all copyrights to the songs used in the story. I did not write them just used them. The artist and title will be in the end of chapter notes.

"Come on, Dorian. It won't be that long, and I'll be home before you know it."

Dorian stared at the man driving. Said man had been his whole world for the past four years. They both had gone to Skyhold University together, but Dorian had decided to continue studying while the other enlisted. 

Hadiden Lavellan had been from a lower class family, one from a little city near Kirkwall. Dorian had never heard of it, given he had been from Tevinter but had a scholarship for Skyhold Uni. Hadiden had gotten a scholarship too, hence the reason they were both at the same university. Hadiden was studying for a biology degree, wanting to spend his life caring for animals. Dorian was more interested in majoring in history; he wanted to possibly become a professor or to work at the history museum downtown.

But the two had met their freshman years, both going into the bar downtown. Dorian had never been, but his friend Felix had said it was a decent place for a drink. When the two friends had gone, Felix had disappeared which left Dorian all alone. The Tevinter would have been lost if a short blonde man hadn't walked up to him, hooked his arm through Dorian's and said, "Coming to this place alone is never a good idea. Come with me."

At first, Dorian would have mistaken the idea as a flirt, one for a one night stand. But the shorter man had lead him to the back where a round table was set up and a group of people were playing cards. Dorian sat beside the man, feeling dizzy and confused. The man ordered a drink for Dorian and leaned over, whispering to him, "there were some people eyeballing you. This place isn't for the upperclass, and I'm sure they would have tried to mug you if you left alone."

Dorian stared at him.

"How do you know?"

The man laughed. 

"It almost happened to my friend Cassandra. I say almost because she beat the shit out of the muggers." 

The smile the man flashed had Dorian's heart skipping a beat. 

The blonde man had introduced himself, his friends, and the owner (Varric Tethras owned The Hanged Man, but he was also an author. Hadiden had met him in Kirkwall and the two stayed in contact. Hadiden wouldn't go into detail though). It was needless to say that after a few drinks and some suggestive flirting, Dorian and Hadiden left together to Dorian's apartment. What Dorian believed was going to be a one night stand turned into a four-year-going-on-five-years relationship. 

"You say that, Amatus, but I won't be able to see you for fourteen weeks. And then you go on your first tour," Dorian said, turning his gaze away from the car window to look at the blonde driver. He was a bit shorter than Dorian, possibly by a foot and a half, but he had a fit slim build that Dorian thanked God for on most days.

What Dorian didn't want to do was imagine his lover's messy blonde hair in a buzz cut, military style. He didn't want to see the war paint or the camo on the man. He didn't want to think of him going down range, putting his life at risk.

Hadiden sighed. "I know, Dorian," he said. "But I'm not the only one going. You know Cullen is enlisted, and Cassandra already went through her training. She's deploying in a week. There's nothing to worry about. And I'll write you as much as I can, Dorian."

Hadiden reached his hand out to turn up the radio, then left it for Dorian to grab. Of course, the Tevinter man held the waiting hand, needing it more the reality then anything else. 

_"Hey, I know it hurts to watch me leave  
But say it ain't so, how could you ever replace me?"_

Hadiden began to sing along to song playing. When they first started dating and took long car rides, the two would constantly flip through the channels. After awhile, they had agreed to just make a CD with music that both agreed on. Honestly, Dorian had allowed Hadiden to pick most of the songs because he wanted Hadiden to sing along to the songs. The older man adored when the enlisted man would sing at the top of his lungs, singing while doing the dishes, the laundry, driving, or cooking. Some days it wouldn't be very good singing, like when he struggled to hit high notes the both knew he couldn't reach, but Dorian loved it no matter what. 

_"You're so shy when you wanna be standing in front of me_  
Mind spinning in circles, you're waiting to speak  
These hands here in front of me anxiously wait to see  
How's it gonna be." 

Dorian felt the pinpricks of tears as he listened to Hadiden sing, as the airport came into view. He knew it was coming, knew all morning. But he didn't want to admit to himself that Hadiden was leaving so soon. He didn't want to let go of this man quite yet. 

_"Before I go, oh oh oh oh_  
Let me remind you what you're waiting for  
Before you go, oh oh oh oh  
Could you love me just a little bit more?  
One more time." 

Dorian couldn't find the words, couldn't force the words that had lost so much meaning in them, couldn't force them to the surface. He couldn't find the right words to tell Hadiden how much he meant to him, how much he didn't want him to leave. He didn't want to see him go to be an infantry soldier. 

_"Hey, hey darling, its so damn hard to say goodbye  
You know I'll try my hardest, I'll never change who I am inside."_

Hadiden parked, parked at drop off and pick up at the airport. Dorian knew that the other would get out, say their goodbyes, and Dorian would be forced to drive away while Hadiden boarded his plane to leave. 

With the car shut off, the two men got out of the car. Dorian watched as Hadiden opened the trunk and got his single bag out. Dorian had left his hands hanging by his sides, not really knowing what to do. With previous relationships being hidden, kept quiet, he was still learning to be affectionate in public to Hadiden. He waited, watched as Hadiden turned to look at him. For a moment, Dorian swore he looked seventeen, fresh to the world. Yet, he knew he was twenty three. 

It was sudden, as sudden as their first meeting, but Hadiden dropped his bag and threw his arms around Dorian. Dorian felt a blush creep onto his face, but he ignored it. The Tevinter man held onto the smaller man, keeping him close. He didn't want to let go, didn't want that plane to fly off with the man he adored. Dorian wanted to keep Hadiden close, hug him while the plane left and his contract terminated. 

Dorian wanted Hadiden to stay, but knew deep, deep in his heart he had to let go. He couldn't force Hadiden to stay. He knew what it was like to have someone to force their plans on him. He wasn't going to do that to Hadiden.

When the smaller man pulled back, his hands found Dorian's face, cupping it. Hadiden smiled as he wiped away a tear Dorian had shed. Soft lips pressed against his own.

Their last kiss until he returned home.

It felt like burning passion, that five second kiss. When it was broken, when Hadiden pulled away, Dorian could barely hear him say goodbye. He didn't hear himself say goodbye, but felt the lump in his throat forming. He only could watch as his love walked into an airport.

Dorian sat in that car, the silent car. He refuses to turn on the radio, to listen to any of the songs on their playlist. He sat and watched as a silver jet took off, knowing exactly that that was the one Hadiden was on. He watched as it disappeared, knowing Hadiden was staring down at the ground and could still see him. 

It hurt, almost physically painful to watch that plane go. It was painful to know he won't be able to see his boyfriend for so long. He would have to wait for phone calls or letters.

Neither would truly satisfy Dorian until Hadiden came home.


	2. Chapter 2

"Hadiden?"

"Hey, Dorian. I don't have long to talk. I have first formation in about fifteen minutes. But I wanted to let you know that the plane had landed safely and I made it to the fort."

"Fasta vass! Amatus, you could have shot me a text to let me know sooner? I was practically up all night wondering if you made it!"

"I'm sorry, vhenan! I had no time! Our plane was the last to land. We got shuffled onto a bus and taken to the reception battalion and... Gods we got off and these drill sergeants started yelling at us! We had to do push ups the minute we got off the bus. There was a girl across from where I was and she started crying."

"Hadiden, what have you gotten yourself into?"

"That's what I'm wondering. We were told to go to bed, but we have to be outside in now ten minutes. Half the guys are on their phones calling home. I think there's only two guys sleeping."

"Why aren't you asleep?"

"I wanted to hear your voice."

"Hadiden Lavellan, you will be the death of me."

"You tell me that a lot. It makes me wonder if that's your way of saying you love me."

"I swear-"

"I know, I know. Ar lath ma, ma'vhenan. I don't have much longer, but I have an offer to make."

"Yes, yes, what is it?"

"I know it's five in the morning and you're only awake because you were worrying, but when I hang up and you go to bed, I promise the next time I call that I'll sing your favorite song."

".... Promise?"

"Of course. Deal?"

"Deal. I will go to sleep as soon as you hang up. But, just so you know, I will be sleeping on your side of the bed."

"Tragic! I wouldn't expect you to do any less."

"Please be safe out there, Hadiden. I'm not out there to keep you out of trouble."

"Dorian Pavus, I'm the one that keeps you out of trouble."

"Believe what you will, Amatus."

"Go to bed, emma lath. I'll talk to you when I get another chance."

"Be safe, Hadiden."

"I will."

_Call ended: 12 minutes and 48 seconds._


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the notes on Chapter Two should be on Chapter one but I have no clue how to fix it and so it's just like that. 
> 
> It's so stupid but I'm not even going to both with it right now.

"Dorian?"

"Hmm?"

"Did I wake you?"

"No, just studying. Is it lights out already?"

"No, not quite. I have about thirty minutes until lights out. I already took a shower, so I have plenty of down time."

"That's good."

"Sure, it would be. If the showers weren't just an open room with six shower heads."

"No privacy?"

"None."

"See anyone more impressive than me? Someone you'd leave me for?"

"Dorian! No!"

"I'm joking, mostly."

"There's no one here that I would leave you for. Most of them are country boys, and not the good kind. The other half of them are straight."

"Oh what a relief."

"I'm sure. Now, I promised you a song, didn't I?"

"You did."

_"Wise men say only fools rush in  
But I can't help falling in love with you-"_

"Fasta vass, is this-"

_"Shall I stay? Would it be a sin  
If I can't help falling in love with you?"_

"If you finish-"

_"Like a river flows_  
Surely to the sea  
Darling, so we go  
Some things were meant to be." 

"I feel like a love sick teenager-"

_"Take my hand, take my whole life too  
'Cause I can't help falling in love with you-"_

"Hadiden-"

_"Like a river flows_  
Surely to the sea  
Darling, so we go  
Some things were meant to be." 

"I miss you-"

_"Take my hand, take my whole life too_  
'Cause I can't help falling in love with you  
'Cause I can't help falling in love with you-" 

"... Can't help falling in-"

_"But I can't help falling in love with you."_

"I promise I'm not crying."

"I know you aren't."

"Please come home soon."

"I will, Dorian. I'll be home soon."

"I'll... I'll let you get to sleep."

"All right. Good night, Dorian."

"Good night, Hadiden. Sweet dreams."

_Call ended: 26 minutes and 17 seconds._


	4. Chapter 4

"Hadiden? I thought you'd call last night-"

"Hi Dorian, I am calling to let you know that I've made it to my company and platoon-"

"Wait what-"

"This will be the last phone call you will receive from me until our phase over-"

"Are you being serious-"

"I will be able to call again in a few weeks. Until then, I will be writing a letter with my new address-"

"Why didn't you tell me last night-"

"I love you, Dorian. Goodbye."

"Wait, Hadiden-"

_Call ended: 3 minutes and 4 seconds._


	5. Chapter 5

_Dear Dorian,_

_Vhenan, I am so sorry for the sudden and emotionless phone call last week. We had only five minutes to call a loved one to let them know they wouldn't be getting anymore phone calls for awhile. I hated doing it, but I wanted you to know that I am safe and with my company._

_But because I have down time, I wanted to give you a bit more of an update._

_So I've been divided into third platoon. Our nickname is the Spartans, which is pretty cool! The other platoons are like the assassins, the commandos, and executioners. My drill sergeants are pretty cool, most of them have been infantry before. One of the other platoon's drill sergeants doesn't like my platoon. I don't really know why, but she hates us! She had us doing push ups for at least fifteen minutes._

_Right now we're doing a lot of marching and drill. In two weeks we will be going on our first camping trip. By camping, I mean doing training while spending the night outside._

_I hope I get some sleep soon! Every night we keep getting woke up in the middle of the night by a drill sergeant! I don't even know why. I'm too tired to even remember in the morning that it actually happened. Last night I almost slept through all the other guys yelling at me to get up. We would have been fucked if I stayed in bed._

_Sunday we have services. Some of the guys want me to go with them, but I think I'm going to just stay back. I hear we can do laundry and I rather wash my smelly clothes than go to worship a God that I don't personally worship._

_I should probably cut this short. I have final formation soon and I want to mail this before formation. My address is on the return address on the envelope. Also, I'll have the address written on the back of this letter just so you won't lose it._

_Ar lath ma, Dorian._

_-Private Hadiden Lavellan_


	6. Chapter 6

_Dear Hadiden,_

_As much as I want to be furious over our last phone call, I can't be mad. I understand the situation, mostly, but I wish you could keep your phone. I liked the phone calls and being at least able to hear you. Letters are nice though._

_I'm sure that that drill sergeant doesn't hate you. Maybe she's just jealous your platoon is the best or something. I'm sure you're going to be the best soldier there and she will feel ridiculous for making you all do push ups._

_And why would they make you do that? Go outside for training all night? I can't see the point in it but there's probably a reason for that kind of training._

_In other news, I passed my history finals and I plan on taking a least two courses in business management. It wasn't on my original plan, but it seems that my father is ill and passing his business to me. Oh, how I can't wait to be the owner of a business I was originally running from. Funny, isn't it? Life just does what it pleases._

_Do try and write me again soon. It's terribly dull here without you. Even our weekend games of Wicked Grace aren't as fun as they were with you around._

_I will also be passing your address to our dear friends so that they may write to you. I figured you'd like the support, not just from me. Don't quote me on this, but I'm sure Sera plans on sending hand drawn pictures of butts. I also told them no food or anything, just like the paper of rules you sent told me. I'm pretty sure Sera was upset by that because she wanted to send cookies._

_I know I don't say it much, but I miss you. Be safe out there, Amatus._

_Truly,  
-Dorian Pavus_


	7. Chapter 7

_Dear Hadiden,_

_Sparkler let us have your mailing address about a week ago. I've been meaning to write to you but with the bar and keepin' an eye on all our friends, I couldn't find the right time._

_So now is the right time._

_Sparkler still comes into the bar, plays Wicked Grace. He doesn't talk too much, though. He's seems pretty blue over your shipping. Tiny keeps trying to cheer him up, know what it's like to be in the service and says you're fine, but Sparkler doesn't listen too much. I know you don't like when Cole drinks, since he's technically under age, but he seems just as sad as Sparkler. I talked with him and asked what was wrong and he sighed, said that the energy feels empty without you, and asked for a shot._

_Chuckles came by, your professor. He asked about you and how you were doing. He said something about how you are making him proud. I gave him a drink if he'd leave. Something about that guy seems off._

_Buttercup actually came in with cookies. I'm pretty sure Sparkler nearly cried because of it. Apparently, since she didn't save any for me, they were almond chocolate chip, your favorite._

_We're throwing a party for your birthday coming up. Sparkler's idea. I'm probably going to make that drink you should be, the one with mint in it. Buttercup is going to make more cookies, and Tiny and Kid are going to decorate and take pictures for you. I'm pretty sure Nightingale and Ruffles will get gifts and save them for your return._

_Also, Sparkler said you'll be going on tour after training? I really hope you don't go on tour. I've seen how that shit can mentally mess you up. My friend Hawke still really isn't right since his tours. I'm thankful that Broody has him seeing a doctor and is taking care of him. I don't think he'd be right without him._

_I hope your training doesn't kill you. You're a tough kid, I know you'll get through it._

_-Varric Tethras_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear that that note keeps showing up and I don't know how to fix it so fuck it.
> 
> Fuck it.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had this chapter finished for two weeks and forgot to post it.
> 
> Whoops.
> 
> Also, Haply Thanksgiving everyone. I'll be playing dragon age today.

_Dear Sera,_

_Thank you for the letter and butt drawings. I'm going to be super sappy and say that I smiled a whole lot when I seen your letter and Varric's. Of course, I had to do some extra push ups because I was smiling in formation, but it was worth it._

_And I also want to thank you for keeping an eye on Dorian for me. I know he's sad. As much as I know he likes to deny it in his letters, he's sad and needs to support from you and the gang._

_And do I have some stuff for you!_

_So a week ago we had checks in our sleeping bays. While the drill sergeants had knocked over our lockers, spilling our shit onto the floor, we were checked. They were looking for contraband. I didn't have any, but I watched one of the males have his bed flipped off the top bunk and the drill sergeants found candy wrappers. They were not happy sergeants. Another dude was hiding a bullet shell under his mattress. The drill sergeants were even more pissed at that._

_It wasn't even five minutes after that that one of the male drill sergeants found a bunch of letters between a male private and a female private. Apparently they had to ask which female (there were two Sam females. It wasn't either one of them) had been writing to the male private. They figured out it was a whole different female and they're both getting chapters on them. I wanted to laugh at their stupidity._

_Yesterday we did platoon introductions. Our drill sergeant wanted us to introduce ourselves and why we enlisted. A few females said because college. One female said she was trying to get away from some bad lifestyles her family had. One male said because his whole family was in the service. When it got to me, I wasn't ashamed to say my reason. I told them it was to protect my boyfriend. I might have added that I wanted to protect him because I know what happens when you can't protect your family (since I couldn't save them from the car crash). The drill sergeant stopped the introductions to say that if anyone is treated poorly due to religion, race, sexuality, or anything else like that, there would be problems. After that, when we were allowed a ten minute break, one of the guys said I was brave and was doing a good thing. He's an older guy, last name Rainier. He's really wise._

_Tomorrow we march out to our camping site. Don't tell Dorian yet, I want to surprise him, but it's the last thing we do in red phase. Once we stick over to white phase, I'm allowed a phone call. And the best part? Because I scored really well on my PT test, my drill sergeant is giving me five extra minutes! I can't wait!_

_I miss you Sera, and let everyone know I'm still breathing._

_-Private Hadiden Lavellan_


	9. Chapter 9

"Hello-"

"Dorian!"

"Hadiden?!"

"Yes, yes it's me. I only have-"

"Kaffas! Amatus why didn't you tell me you would be calling? I'm with everyone and I swear if you make me cry-"

"Dorian, I only have about thirteen minutes now. I'm calling because we are in white phase now."

"What does that mean? Also, Cole says hi."

"Tell Cole I said hi back. And it means I'm one third of the way finished with my training."

"Truly? Does that mean you'll be home sooner?"

"I still have about two weeks after basic for my basic infantry training."

"So what you're telling me is that you won't be home for another two months?"

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault."

"Dorian?"

"Yes?"

"I love you, vhenan."

"... Well now our whole friend group knows I'm crying. Thank you for that, Amatus."

"That's my job. Now, just talk about something. I want to hear your voice for the rest of my phone time."

"Like what? Also Varric is waving from across the bar and- hey-

"Elf? Is that you?"

"Sera? Did you just steal the phone from Dorian?"

"Sure did! Pbbbbllltttt! -here Dorian. I'm done."

"Vhenan?"

"Well now, that was plain rude. Hadiden, you do know that I miss you, right?"

"Of course, Dorian. I kind of regret coming out here, for one or two reasons."

"Such as?"

"Sex. I miss that. But I honestly miss you. It's so weird being away from you since... Well... You're the only family I've had since my parents' crash."

"Amatus, I know. But you'll be home soon, I'll ravage you for a week at least, and everything will fall into a normal pattern again."

"Don't tempt me to quit now, because that's tempting- Shit."

"What?"

"Drill Sergeant says I have a minute left."

"Don't get into trouble on my behave now."

"Oh, but I like the trouble. Ar lath ma, Dorian. You'll hear from me again soon."

"I'm holding you to that promise."

"Goodbye Dorian."

"Goodbye Amatus."

_Call Ended: 15 minutes and 13 seconds._


	10. Chapter 10

_Dear Hadiden,_

_Dorian says that I can write you, and that I might be able to cheer you up. He says your training is really hard out there, and I wish I could help. None of us like knowing you're hurt, but Dorian most of all._

_He's sad. Really sad. It's the first time you two have been apart in four years, right? And since Felix has passed away, from cancer I hear, he isn't much better. Varric and I have tried to comfort him the best we can, but we know it isn't the same. We aren't you._

_Varric gave me a bunch of photos to send to you. He doesn't have much time to write, since his ex wife has been coming around, and a few people that he used to know. They aren't nice men and they're always asking him for money. Yesterday he threatened to throw twelve bottles of vodka at them. They weren't happy but they left._

_The pictures are actually from the party we held for you. Varric and Cassandra and Dorian all planned it before Cassandra was shipped. I think she went to Iraq. I don't remember. She wrote a week later and told us that she was doing okay. Cullen left soon after, joining the same company as Cassandra, but he's an officer, so he's above her._

_I hope you do well with the rest of your training. Varric says that we are going to surprise Dorian by visiting you on your family day. Did you purposefully send that message to Varric? I think it's a great idea, but I don't want to see Dorian cry again. Maybe he will cry out of happiness by seeing you! I hope. I don't like either one you being sad._

_Keep going, Hadiden._

_-Cole_


	11. Chapter 11

_Dear Bull,_

_You will not believe half the shit I've gone through already. From your last letter, you're making my training sound weak, but I'll assure you, it's still pretty rough._

_We've been getting ready for qual. I love going down range, spending most of the day out in the field instead of being stuck in at the company. I feel bad for the non trainers who can't fire off their weapons. The only thing I don't like about qualifications is how hot my weapon gets when it lays out in the sun. Burns my hands._

_Oh! Funny story to tell the group when you see them again; so we were getting ready for our first motor move, and the drill sergeant forgot to mention that we had to have the trash taken out and the bay spotless before we left. So the first time, we were given a warning. The second time wasn't as forgiving._

_We had gotten back from a day on the range, all hot and sweaty and gross. The drill sergeants were smiling and our bay drill sergeant told us to go to our bay. As I ran by, I heard one say that we were in for a treat. I guess if I had been paying attention, I would have known what was happening. But all the males in my bay were released and we ran up to our bay._

_Our whole bay was covered in sand and water. The drill sergeant said we had thirty minutes to clean the bay._

_All of us were straggling, freaking out. Everything, besides our bunks, was covered in sand and water. A few guys raced to group a map and bucket, another few went and grabbed the brooms, and like four males grabbed towels. I grabbed one of my own towels and got on my hands and wiped the ground. I looked like I was a four legged animal, but a few males were cheering for me as I swept the kill zone with my towel._

_I had only gotten out of the kill zone when the drill sergeant came in. Our thirty minutes was up and the bay wasn't cleaned at all. It's easy to say we had to do push ups and were given another thirty minutes to clean it again._

_This time we were better organized. We had a few males in the latrine cleaning, the rest in the bay. While it wasn't perfect, it was looking better until one of the males said "I'm from Florida, and if we have baby powder, we can get the watery sand up easier." That was the dumbest idea because the bay was smokey for so fucking long and it only made the mess worse! The drill sergeants even called us a bunch of idiots for the baby powder._

_When our second thirty minutes was up, we still weren't spotless and had to do more push ups. Then we were given fifteen minutes. We cleaned and this time, it was my platoon and fourth platoon cleaning. Second and first platoon decided they were done. We weren't happy about them quitting._

_After fifteen minutes and more push ups, we got fifteen more minutes and that was the last time. It looked decent enough. The drill sergeant said it look all right for the time and said we learned a lesson. Again, second and first platoons decided they wanted to sit out. Our bay boss decided to give them the shitty fire guard shifts for their crappy attitudes._

_We'll also be getting ready for our second FXT soon. I hear we're only staying out there for one day and one night because of a coming storm. The first sergeant doesn't want any of us hurt I guess, which is pretty nice. But besides FXT, we also have our first land navigation course coming soon and another conference course. I'm really excited because the first one was Victory Tower and we got to repeal off a tower and that was so much fun._

_It was a lot more fun than the gas chamber._

_I hope everything is going well with you, and let Krem know I said hi and he can write me too! I hear Varric is planning on having you all come see me for family day or graduation. I can't wait to see you guys._

_Truly,  
Private Hadiden Lavellan_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This happened. The sand was not fun.


	12. Chapter 12

_Dear Amatus,_

_I cannot believe what you're doing out there. A gas chamber, jumping off a building, running an obstacle course under barbed wire in the ran, firing off a weapon for three weeks, staying outside during hurricane season? What's next? Driving cars off the side of a cliff? Next I'll be getting a letter that you've gotten killed, along with all of your company._

_I've recently taken over for my father for the company. It's rather strange hearing Mister Pavus and not have my father answer. Hopefully when you return we will be better off than before and finally be able to redecorate the bedroom or kitchen. Or maybe pay for something a bit nicer. I won't say what that nicer is, but we can discuss that once you're home._

_Drinks at the Hanged Man is pleasant enough. We usually talk about our plans for once you're home. Varric wants to through a party, Bull wants drinks, and I just want a peaceful afternoon with my boyfriend._

_I know you'll be home soon, but it cannot be soon enough. There's so many things I wish I could tell you, let you know, but I assume you already know it and hopefully don't need me to say it. Your coming home will be the highlight of the year, and you being able to stay will be the greatest thing in the world. I am not looking forward to your deployment at all._

_Be safe out there, Amatus. I'm waiting for you to come home._

_Yours Truly,  
Dorian Pavus_


	13. Chapter 13

_Hey Elf!_

_So Varric is tellin' us 'bout all you're training and it's all amazin', right? But it's making everyone super sad! Everyone has on these super huge frowns, even your boyfriend doesn't act like himself._

_Don't call for drinks, laugh, smile. He's actin' like you fell off the earth and just flyin' around in space out there._

_Varric was also tellin' me about surprising you on your family day thing. I know you don't have the fam since the crash thing. The buggers that hit your parents should suck a nut, but that's none of my business. But anyways, Varric wants to know who to bring you. We already know you want your boy toy to come along, duh, but we have enough room in the Inquisivan to bring five more people. Varric wants to drive, so you got him and Dorian already. I wanna come, but I don't think I can be trapped in the car with spirit boy Cole all day. Mister barkeep says him, Dorian, me, Cole, Bull, Josie, and Viv will come. Your eggy professor came by and wants to know if he was allowed to come. I shoved a biscuit in his trousers and told him no. Bull nearly pissed himself._

_I'm gonna mail some memes of food since I can't mail you actual food. Also, as promised, the memes you've missed!_

_Well okay only one since you've been gone. It's about a dead gorilla, Harambe. I dunno the whole story since I don't care, but some kid fell into its pit and the zookeepers thought he'd kill the kid. They shot the gorilla and we're here, makin' jokes outta him. My fave so far is "dicks out for Harambe."_

_I wrote that on Egg Head's head and he was so pissed! It was friggin' funny. Varric took a picture and I'm sending it to you._

_When you get home, Imma make like fifty trillion cookies for you. I'm gonna make you so fat again that all your muscles and abs will be gone 'cause my cookies will be so good._

_Hope you're doin' all right out there and don't kill too many badies. Save a couple for me! (Even though I'll probably never enlist)._

_-insert a drawing of a butt-  
Sera _

_-signed under her name, Sera left a drawing of several bees, a butt, and a drawing of Hadiden firing a gun into the air as people around him looked like they were screaming-_


	14. Chapter 14

Hadiden and the rest of his platoon scurried into the bay, smiling and continuing to sing cadence. They just started singing cadence while marching, which was a blue phase privilege. With the beginning of blue phase passing, Hadiden knew he was going to get a phone call soon, which meant hearing Dorian's voice. He couldn't wait to see the other man, along with his friends, on family day. After family day he would be sent off to finish the rest of his training, then have a month before his first deployment. It was all very nerve racking, but the idea of shipping and being across the seas was very exciting. He just didn't wish to leave Dorian.

"Hey, Lavellan," someone called. Hadiden pecked out from his locker to see Thom Rainier walking to him. The shorter blonde smiled at the taller man, saying, "something up, Rainier?" 

The older man had a baby face without his beard (which Hadiden had seen from his driver's license). But he was tall, strong, and dependable. Hadiden liked talking to him, talking about home, talking about the training. Though they were very two different people, Hadiden being one of the youngest men and Rainier being one of the oldest. Hadiden was short and lanky while Thom was tall and muscular. Yet, the two of them made an excellent team together, and their drill sergeants seen it. 

But Thom shook his head and whispered, "I heard our drill sergeants talking. They say they're going to be switching our PG to someone else." That made Hadiden frown. He liked their current platoon guide, thought that he was doing fine. Their current PG was also their bay boss, which he was handling just as well. Why would their sergeants want to change it?

"Why?" Hadiden asked, closing his locker and locking it. He never would forget to lock his locker after seeing his platoon mates have their lockers knocked over, their stuff falling out while the drill sergeants continued on. Thom just shrugged. 

"Want to give different people a chance, I presume. I also figure that our next PG will be in charge when we march off to FTX3," Thom. Hadiden bit his lip, a nervous tick, before saying, "A PG never gets sleep during FTX, or so I was told. A friend of mine was infantry and he was a PG for their last FTX. He was a dead man walking, so I was told." 

"As much as I would like a chance to lead our platoon around the battalion, I don't think I could handle being a PG for FTX," Thom admitted. Hadiden shrugged. 

"I mean, you're also third squad's leader, so you'll have your own work too. Let's just hope afterwards isn't too bad. Specifically the march," Hadiden groaned. "I barely made it through the last one. I don't know how a 12k is going to work." Hadiden frowned, remembering how sore his feet were last their last march. And the blister on the back of his heel was coming back for revenge, which really hurt. He needed another blister kit. 

Rainier patted Hadiden on the shoulder. "Don't worry, Lavellan. Just drink a lot of water this week and during the march. I have an extra kit if that blister is still bugging you before we head to the site." The shorter blonde nodded and smiled, thanking Thom. Hadiden still had to get ready for final formation, needing to fill his canteen and at least rinse off in the shower. Rinsing off would be quicker than washing, by at least a minute. Every minute counted. After that, he would hopefully have time to stretch. Stretching also felt good before bed, and tonight, Hadiden didn't have fire guard watch. No fire guard meant a full night sleep. 

 

"Private Lavellan and a battle buddy, get over here!" Hadiden's drill sergeant was peaking his head out from their office. 

Hadiden stepped back out of formation, nodding to the guy beside him, calling out, "moving, drill sergeant!" 

The short man ran to the door, moving to stand inside the red box to the left of the office. Both men stood at attention, their M16 rifles standing against their legs. At the end of blue phase they would have their rifles taken back, after being cleaned. Hadiden couldn't wait to be rid of the weapon, even though he knew he would be issued another weapon during his infantry training. 

When the drill sergeant that called for Hadiden walked out of the office, the man beside called the company to ease. No one moved until the sergeant told everyone to carry on. Said sergeant turned to the men and looked at the blonde specifically.

"Private Lavellan," the drill sergeant said. "Relieve Specialist Cousland as platoon guide. You're the PG now."

Hadiden's heart and stomach both dropped. He was PG. He would be leading the platoon during the week and during their next field training. Their drill sergeant was counting on him to be a leader for 40 soldiers. But all Hadiden could say was, "yes, drill sergeant. Always forward, drill sergeant."

"Always forward, private. Now get back to the drill pad," the drill sergeant said, turning to return to the office. 

The blonde man ran to the platoon, telling their PG that he needed to return to formation and that he was now the guide. Cousland looked more than pleased to be a member of the platoon and no longer a guide. Hadiden almost groaned. No more sleep for him.

 

The company had two weeks until their final field training. Hadiden should have been packing, but he had to wait for his laundry. While he waited, he was able to get a couple of the other privates to join him in the latrines. In the latrine, for the most part, drill sergeants couldn't come in and they could do what they wanted. Most privates took naps in showers, waking when a runner came in to tell them the drill sergeant was in the bay. Others just stayed in the latrine because it wasn't freezing and a good place to chat. Hadiden found himself in the latrine on Sundays to chat with some of his platoon mates. 

One of his battle buddies, Private First Class Arylin Tabris was a city man that decided to join the army instead of going to jail, had made a fact deck of cards for them to play with. They usually bet things like stamps, razors, some times floss, when they played cards. Tabris seemed rather proud to have gotten so many privates into his game. Specialist Michael Cousland usually went to services and didn't get to play, but this Sunday he was in the bay to play. 

"Lavellan, you have no idea how happy I am you're the PG now," Cousland said. Hadiden scoffed.

"You're happy you won't be up all night." Hadiden tossed his cards to the middle, not happy with his hand. He was glad he didn't bet his stamps this round. He needed his stamps for his mail.

The religious boy just shrugged before tossing in a razor to their betting pile. "'Bout right," he admitted. "I can handle being in a fox hole all day for four days, but what you'll be doing, I can't handle."

Everyone around laughed. Tabris shook his head. 

"Very dignified, soldier. Aren't we all going infantry? Shouldn't you be accepting what we're doing?" Tabris asked. He tossed in two stamps. 

Michael shrugged again. "Say what you will, but I lived a comfortable life. I'm still adjusting to this."

Suddenly the latrine door was opened, a male's voice calling, "drill sergeant on the way! He just went into second bay!" 

"That's the game. Clean up Tabris. Lavellan, you and I will wake the others up," Cousland said. 

"Roger that, Bay Boss," Hadiden said, standing and stretching. 

Hopefully they could avoid push-ups for one Sunday.

**Author's Note:**

> Song used:  
> "Postcards And Polaroids"  
> By Sleeping with Sirens
> 
> Oh! I would also like to make mention to those who are reading "If Only Without Magic"  
> That is not discontinued. I'm working on the next chapter. I just made myself a little sad so I needed a break.


End file.
